Submitted by Johnny_Law
Before he was the drummer for Dethklok, Pickles was the lead singer of Snakes n’ Barrels, an L.A. glam band. The rest of Dethklok, after watching a documentary on their drummer, begins to tease Pickles, and even question his loyalty. Pickles insists his loyalty is to Dethklok, but when the band’s manager mentions Snakes n’ Barrel’s soaring record sales along with the possibility of a reunion tour, he seizes the opportunity. With Dethklok officially on hiatus, The Tribunal sees an opportunity to ruin Pickles and Snakes n’ Barrels. Their plan: take advantage of Snakes n’ Barrels’ drug addiction with Totally Awesome Sweet Alabama Liquidsnake, a drug that wipes the mind of its user clean. The Tribunal hopes to brainwash Pickles with their drug and reprogram him to destroy Dethklok. At Mordhaus, the rest of the band ponders over their own side projects and old bands, except Toki, who’s never been in another band. Meanwhile Pickles rehearses with his old group, only to find out that years of sobriety has not been kind to his old bandmates.
Pickles, shocked at how bad his old band has become, decides to whip them into shape. Backstage, before the band’s first concert, Pickles is visited by Dethklok, who are drunk and jealous of their drummer’s success. The rest of Snakes n’ Barrels, desperate for some drugs, buy some vials of totally awesome sweet Alabama liquid snake from The Tribunal’s pharmacist. On stage, the guys offer Pickles their drugs, which he gladly accepts. Fueled by the totally awesome sweet Alabama liquid snake, the band is in top form. However, the side effects of the drug cause Snakes n’ Barrels to suffer from terrifying hallucinations. Pickles is the only one that is immune due to his high tolerance for drugs and “kiddie glaucoma”. The live recording of Snakes n’ Barrel’s one night reunion is dubbed the most brutal album of all time. Pickles’ Dethklok band mates reluctantly agree with the acclaim.
Skwisgaar: To compliments you, you were such a beautifuls lady back then. Maybe yous all favor us with some makes ups tips?
Toki: Pickle, this Snakes and Barrel it’s not my cup of tea. It sucks.
Pickles: Well, that’s not a nice thing to say, Toki.
Toki: Not my fault it sucks.
Nathan: Oh come on guys, it’s not like this is anyone’s first band. You’ll probably all want to go reunite with your old bands at some point.
Toki: Dethklok is my first band.
Nathan: Oh, well one day you’ll want to reunite with us.
Toki: Why? We already together.
Nathan: Just because we’re not broken up, doesn’t mean we can’t reunite.
Skwisgaar: Actuallys I think dats exactlys what dats means.
Skwisgaar: You can’ts reunites with a bands that has nots brokes up. They won’t let you.
Toki: That sucks, great.
Nathan: Wait, can we have a not reunion tour? Where we know, just come out and like you know, do a regular show?
Skwisgaar: No. I looked into it.
Nathan: Well that’s pretty lame.
Skwisgaar: I sometimes gets contacteds by my old bands mates trying to you know, rides my coatstails like you know, drowning rats. But I says “Screw, you go die”.
Nathan: Your music sucks and you’re an ASSHOLE! I’m having a hard time expressing myself.
Pickles: I grew up smoking government weed every day you know, I had kiddie glaucoma. Don’t ask me, I’m immune to just about everything.
Murderface: What a great way to go out too. I only hope we can end that way, clawing our eyes out, throwing up acid blood.