Submitted by WhiteLight


Fans are rabid for Dethklok’s newest release, for which there is an upcoming cd release party. General Crozier is now head of all military operations and has turned his attention to the home front. Changing the news channel, Toki and Skwisgaar find a man sucking his own dick. They’re exasperated that such a thing is even possible, Skwisgaar commenting that Toki is drinking straight vodka before noon. Nathan and Pickles join in the conversation saying that all they do in life, is to get someone else to suck your dick for you. Murderface runs in yelling ‘fire drill’ and trying to get the band to evacuate, who just stare at him and ask him what he’s doing. After explaining the obvious he states that he’s the ‘band fire chief’. After a lengthy rant he mumbles that he heard something about ‘sucking your own dick’.

Mr. Selatcia and Vater Orlaag are in meeting, discussing the upcoming events along with the General. Mr. Selatcia reveals that he will soon ‘enlighten’ the General, and that Dethklok’s ‘time will come’.
In a band meeting Ofdensen wishes to discuss many things, mainly security. Nathan starts goofing off by mimicking Toki’s voice, apparently quite accurately. Pickles can ‘play’ the trumpet, and Toki is once again shit-faced. Murderface steps down as fire chief and Nathan requests the hiring a yoga instructor to work on their ‘flexibility’.
At a UN meeting, the worlds’ leaders voice their concern about the album release, stating that the world is now dependent on Dethklok and are worried about the Revengencers. Apparently their numbers have gone through the roof and they have a sonic weapon they intend to use on Dethklok. General Crozier gives his personal oath that he will stop the Revengencers or die trying.
Sitting around with each other in yoga practice, the guys make Murderface try and suck himself off, but decide the whole thing is way too gay. Toki, drunk, falls down the stairs. The band express their concern briefly, and agree not to continue trying to suck themselves off.

Edgar Jomfru has made a deal with Lavona Succuboso in which she gets Nathan’s mojo and then turns him over to Edgar.
Ofdensen rounds up the band who has all strained their backs trying to suck themselves off, except Toki, who is drunk.
The show stage erupts from the ground atop a rocket and pods entrap groups of fans that also lift off. The stage unfolds high up in the atmosphere where Dethklok perform a song. Afterwards they return to the industry party. The Revengencers have set up their weapon across from Mordhaus and have begun sneaking in. The weapon sonically attacks Mordhaus which until then was protected by a force field. With the field down missiles are launched. Ofdensen counters with mechanical flyers that seek out and destroy the missiles.
Murderface grabs a loudspeaker and leads some guests away from fire while Pickles and Skwisgaar go after the master recording. They’re attacked by Revengencers, who are now inside Mordhaus. Nathan rescues Toki but is attacked by Lavona who almost gets his mojo but is thwarted by Toki. Ofdensen leads a team on flying craft to take out the sonic weapon. Most are shot down but Ofdensen dives one into it before leaping to another flyer. The weapon is destroyed but the Metal Masked Assassin is now after him. The teenage Jomfru replacement hits Ofdensen with a shot from a crossbow knocking him to the ground where the Assassin starts beating the crap out of him. Nathan, after telling Toki that he really needs to cut back on the drinking knocks the assassin over the head with a flaming timber. It would appear both the assassin and Ofdensen are still alive.

Crozier knocks the teenager out with a rifle butt to the head and finds himself in the presence of Mr. Selatcia and Vater Orlaag. Selatcia shows Crozier a vision, which is hard to make out but contains images of the band and Selatica himself in some kind of old armor.
Edgar Jomfru shows up with a shotgun to take out Pickles and Skwisgaar but can’t pull the trigger. Pickles states that he managed to suck himself off. He is beaten up by hooded Mordaus agents.
The band is now together, safely outside of Mordhaus, which is on fire.



Click here to view all the images in Crozier's vision.




“Toki, its like noon.” “Aws thanks Big Bens, nows I knows what time it is.” – Skwisgaar, Toki

“Yup. Conversation over.” – Nathan

“Let’s make sure this record drops the way it should. Without a fucking hitch.” – Ofdensen

“That’s my bread and butter you’re fucking with.” - Nathan