by kloud13


Toki is enraged to learn that he has been left off of the most recent edition of “The Dethklok Minute,” a news segment featuring the band. He becomes even more infuriated when buckets of slime are poured on him as part of his acceptance of the Argentinian award for Children’s Favorite, and decides in that moment that he hates kids. Later, in the band’s meeting room, Ofdensen announces that Toki has been chosen to be the spokesperson for the Wish For Something Foundation, which helps make dying children’s wishes a reality. Toki angrily declines, despite the video from the foundation of a wheelchair-bound little girl, Juliet Sarmansadandle, who’s dying wish is to meet him. He tells the band that he doesn’t want to be associated with children anymore, even dying ones, and that he’s sick of being the cutesy band member. He storms off to his room and dons a new spiky outfit and a blowtorch, bathing himself and his room in blood and gore.

Later, Pickles helps Nathan to record himself reading all of Shakespeare’s works for a books-on-tape series. Pickles, attempting to dispel the rumors that he doesn’t drink very much, is on a drinking binge and as a result of his drunkenness he forgets to push the record button for Nathan. He doesn’t realize it until hours into the recording session – after Nathan has lost his voice – and when Nathan finds out he is furious. Elsewhere in Mordhaus, Murderface and Dick Knubbler begin working on Murderface’s long awaited side project, “Planet Piss,” recording one song and calling it a day. Later on, as Toki walks around Mordhaus cursing at everyone and burning things with his blowtorch, the band discusses what should be done with him because he is beginning to freak them out with his unusual behavior. They talk about kicking him out of the band (Murderface uses the emotional stress of it as an excuse to drop Planet Piss), but hold off when Ofdensen comes up with a plan. He gives Toki a DVD of Juliet Sarmansadandle singing a song she wrote for Toki (which she accompanies with her Guitar Hero controller), and when he watches it, he gets in touch with his younger self and realizes that he loves kids. Unfortunately, it happens too late for Juliet, who has been waiting to see Toki. He runs out to stop her from leaving, but totally freaks out when he finds her dead.







News Announcer: And get ready all you MILFs, GMILFs, and soon-to-be-MILFs, Dethklok’s resident Lothario Skwisgaar Skwigelf has been hitting the nightclub scene lately, and is also interested in acquiring a new stable of FBLs. Good luck girls!

Toki: I pass.
Ofdensen: I’m sorry?
Toki: I’m not associating myself with kids.
Ofdensen: But these ones are dying, Toki.
Toki: Oh… Good!

Toki: Well how comes I can’t sits around and drinks like Pickle? How comes I can’t f*cking sits around and screw sluts or something?! But no, you are the cutesy guy that kids like! You gotta helps people gets over their problems! F*ck that, you dos it!

Toki: Kids! Wish For Something Foundation! I’m gonna make kids wish they was never born! I’m gonna be a demon, thats lives in their nightmaaaaaaares!

Murderface: Ya know what my fear is? I just hope this doesn’t get bigger than Dethklok.
Dick Knubbler: Well, I’ll tell ya this: that’s a good problem to have.

Pickles: Dood, Nathan, you’re gonna kill me, but I totally forgot to press record. Uh, but here’s the good news: I’m sorry!

Toki: Yeeeaaaaaaah… See you in your nightmares, dickweeds!

Pickles: Whoa, whoa, whoa. Okay, alright, relax. Here’s what you do. He sleeps… sack… bar of soap… BANG BANG BANG… brain damage… corn field… gun [gun noise]… funeral.
Skwisgaar: Oh I… that’s may bes a littles too harsh for mes to handle!

(Juliet coughs.)
Pickles: Hey hey hey, can I get you some tequila?
Nathan: Don’t be sad little girl. One day you’re gonna grow up, and you’re gonna be big… oh wait, never mind… sorry.
Skwisgaar: I gots whats to cheers you up! A guitars popsicle! Huh?

Pickles: (singing) I am Pickles the Drummer and I get to sing… here too cause I’m drunk, and f*ck you I’m really really drunk. F*ck you dick weed, f*ck you too! I’m gonna go… I’m gonna lay down… I’m gonna go lay down now. Okay, bye.