Submitted by kloud13
After a long day of shopping, the members of Dethklok show off their new goodies to each other, including Murderface and Toki’s new codpieces and a bunch of watches purchased by Nathan specifically for smashing. Ofdensen stops in to remind the band that it is employee evaluation day, and informs the band that one of their employees is an embezzler. Meanwhile, The Tribunal realizes that Dethklok’s employee conference would be the perfect opportunity to infiltrate Mordhaus, and decides to send in Number 216, a master of infiltration and sabotage. Though he is also a trained killer, the Tribunal decides to only send him to gather information, which seems to make General Crozier unhappy.
Back at Mordhaus, Dethklok interviews their employees, asking each one if they are the embezzler. Number 216 has successfully breached Mordhaus and is seen taking orders directly from Crozier via a screen on his watch. Crozier goes against the rest of the Tribunal by ordering 216 to single out and kill Dethklok. His opportunity comes along almost immediately when he accidentally finds himself in Dethklok’s interview room, but Dethklok – oblivious to their impending doom - is saved by the announcement that the employee raffle and informational seminar is about to begin. The seminar kicks off with a motivational speaker, continuing with an informational video and an exclusive Dethklok music video. The band comes on the stage to do the raffle, and by chance 216 is the first number pulled. The Tribunal’s agent meets the actual employee number 216 (who happens to be only a few feet tall), and in the ensuing fight Agent 216 is accidentally killed when his face is impaled on the raffle prize - Murderface’s diamond-encrusted codpiece. Later it is revealed that the band has been embezzling from themselves, and they all agree to blame it on 216, whom they are giving a funeral as an employee. As 216’s body burns, General Crozier looks on from the screen on the agent’s watch.
Toki: Oh, whats a coincidence! I gots a real cool codpiece too!
Murderface: Uh, that’s a dildo. A strap-on dildo.
Ofdensen: Well, perhaps you should care, because it has come to our attention that one of our employees is a major embezzler.
Nathan: AWESOME… right?
Toki: Ambuzzle? What means that?
Pickles: Well, it’s a super awesome way of saying take having something.
Skwisgaar: Hey guys, I haves a good use of the words unzbuzzle! My lungs unzbuzzle the air from the earth, as I can breath it. Period.
Pickles: Okay, so uh, number 421, you are part of the sector 18 recording studio maintenance clean team. Okay, uh, couple questions. How do you value your what you contribute of to et workforce? Eh, second part: which did you most can’t the least? Skwisgaar?
Pickles: Did you write these questions?
Skwisgaar: Yea I did.
Pickles: Okay, 421? Do you have an answer?
421: I’m a highly skilled microphone cleaner my masters. And what I most can’t the least would be do not a bad job and always a good.
Nathan: We are really really good bosses.
Skwisgaar: Yea I know, we cares about all of dems. It’s like a plantations, but the slaves is our friends.
Toki: Hello. Would you have to’s seat.
Skwisgaar: First of alls, how are you? We cares about each and everyone one of yous little tiny goofballs.
Toki: Oooh, maybe I go crazy, I’m sorry I thought I was asking the questions.
Pickles: Go ahead, go!
Toki: I thought we’s agreed…
Pickles: Toki, who cares! Okay, fine, you ask the questions!
Toki: Fine! I will! Am …you …what …are …we is …a Dethklok employeeeeee?
Skwisgaar: Look at this ones, asleeps in some bloods. We gots to get tougher on these guys maybe, huh?
Nathan: Yea, well all I can think about is the raffle. Can we win it?
Pickles: Dude, I f*ckin’ hope so, it’s the only reason my ass is goin’ to it.
Nathan: Yea, and there’s gonna be an awesome motivational speaker. Oh my god, I love being motivated. I LOVE BEING MOTIVATED!
Face Bones: We’re gonna learn how to be considerate at the workplace!
Skwisgaar: I have to works with you everyday, so please would you please takes it easy on the cologne?
Murderface: While that hurts my feelings, I understand.
Nathan: When you see a piece of trash on the ground, don’t just stand there! PICK IT UP!
Pickles: Yea! An’ don’t leave your lunch lying around either. It attracts ants.
Face Bones: Most importantly, remember, death is an everyday part of the workplace, so when you see a dead body, don’t freak out.
Face Bones: Just ring your death bell!
Nathan: WE RELEASE YOU FROM YOUR EARTHLY DUTIES, and, uh, doodily… I dunno.