Submitted by Johnny_Law
With tax season fast approaching, Dethklok decides to donate some money to charity, beginning with converting a nuclear disposal island in New Guinea into a home for wayward kitties. On the other hand, The Tribunal is concerned about a foster kid that follows the band to all of their shows. He is simply known as fat kid or fattie. In their business meeting, the band discusses finances with their manager Charlie, along with an upcoming concert with the London Philharmonic Orchestra for the United Celebrities of the World Foundation. Nathan decides that the band should have an expensive laser light show, and Charlie agrees. At the band’s rehearsal, their adopted kid causes trouble, resulting in some fighting amongst the band. Dethklok finds out there’s more to raising a kid than they thought.
The band decides that Fatty Ding Dongs should be neutered, much to the protest of their doctor. However, he eventually agrees to neuter their foster kid. Back in Mordland, Toki and Skwisgaar complain about having to feed Fatty, now tethered to a pole. Both realize the difficulties of fatherhood while Fatty struggles for a cupcake. The band’s show with the London Philharmonic ends abruptly when Fatty activates the laser generator, resulting in various orchestra musicians sliced in half. After the concert disaster, the group tries to reconcile with their adopted son, but when Murderface finds his Civil War shoes chewed up, they agree to release Fatty Ding Dongs into the wild. After the band bids a sad farewell to their foster son, he is mauled by kittens.
Toki: Yeah, but checks this out: I can force all the bloods to my face and gives myself a real cool blow job! Dat’s whats I’m talking about.
Skwisgaar: Yous means nose bleed, not blow job.
Charlie: I’m sorry, but who is that fat kid?
Nathan: Don’t play dumb, you know who that is.
Charlie: I have no idea who that is. Who the hell is that?
Pickles: Uh, hello, that’s our son.
Murderface: Yeah, we adopted him for charity.
Charlie: Uh, I’m sorry, how is that for charity?
Nathan: That we are his foster fathers, what do you mean? That’s for charity, right?
Charlie: No Nathan, that’s not donating to money to other organizations, that doesn’t help our tax situation.
Charlie: Yeah. Can you give him back?
Nathan: Hey, that’s a crappy thing to say, but no, I don’t think we can, we tried.
Charlie: Kind of a big deal. London Philharmonic. London Philharmonic, kind of a big deal. Blah. Blah.
Charlie: The donations will go to pharmaceutical research.
Nathan: What kind of pharmaceutical research?
Charlie: Well I’m not sure, it doesn’t say.
Nathan: Have those guys cured anything?
Charlie: Uh, no it says here. No, they have not.
Nathan: Then let’s have a mother freakin’ f*ckin’ laser light show then!
Skwisgaar: Hey we got a lot of work to do, can you please contain your son?
Murderface: Oh, my son? He’s your son too!
Skwisgaar: Dats impossible, hes gots no regamblance to me.
Murderface: He’s not supposed to douchebag, he’s adopted!
Skwisgaar: I thought we agree to never tells him hes adopsted.
Toki: Maybe he gots to go outside and goes to the b-a-s-t-h-r-o-h-m-n-s-e?
Pickles: Aw, but he loves eating that crap, what are we, we just can’t take that away from him. What are we, nazis?
Nathan: Hey goofball, look who’s all neutered? You are. You’re neutered, huh goofball? He’s a neutered guy.
Toki: You know, I’m starting to get sick of this fatherhoods thing. And why are we the ones that always gets stuck feeding his fat ass? I think they racist or something.
Skwisgaar: Try not to chokes you big fat tub of sh*t! We loves you.
Toki: Well Fatty, dats was not great back there how you killed an entire orchestra.
Skwisgaar: It looks cool, but it does nots reflects on us vury well.
Skwisgaar: Look, der he goes. He’s free, finally.
Toki: Dat fats beautiful sons of a bitch will be better off dere.
Nathan: He’ll be fine, he’s fat.